REAL effed up ID

I’m now in a REAL ID state. Getting my new driver license was an adventure. Not counting the time spent on the Internet to determine what paperwork I’d need to bring* (and assembling it all), it only took four or five times as long to swap out my old license for the new POS, than it did in my previous state.

I… endeared myself to the DMV staff. They have a peculiar system in which you have to wait in line to talk to a clerk. The clerk runs through the list of required documents to make sure they have everything. Only then do they give the sucker a number so they can wait to be serviced (in the animal husbandry sense, naturally, right over the counter)…

…by the same clerk.

Most folks didn’t have enough documentation.

My endearing part was waiting for the bureaucratically bewildered boffins to exclaim, “So what do I need to do now?” and add to the clerk’s instructions, “And send nastygrams to your congresscritter and senators because those SOBs are the ones who did it to you.”

True, that won’t help. But I do think it’s only fair to share the misery with those assholes.

Next time — and suggested for those who still need to obtain a DL — I think I’ll just tell ’em I’m an illegal alien. They don’t have to cough up all the paperwork, just a MatrĂ­cula Consular ID card (which the Mexican consulates will hand out like dime store novelties to anyone with a smattering of Spanish).

I noticed that my temporary DL isn’t actually REAL ID compliant. No doubt they’ll make sure to put my yellow star on the permanent card they mail out.

Oh, and it now appears that I’m also registered to [-giggle-] vote.


* I’d planned to reregister my vehicle first, because that is listed as one of the acceptable documents for getting a DL. But it turns out that the DL is required (with another stack of forms) for the registration. Next time someone makes an offer for my truck, I’ think I’ll take it, and buy a bicycle.

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7 thoughts on “REAL effed up ID

  1. wdg3rd April 28, 2015 / 10:19 pm

    Where the fuck are you? Nuevo Hampshire rejected that Real ID crap a decade back or so.

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  2. ClareB April 29, 2015 / 1:11 pm

    “A” was under the impression that she had to have records for birth, marriage, divorce, remarriage, and name changes in unbroken chain in order to prove that she is who her CURRENTLY HELD driver’s license says she is. She thought she might not be able to simply renew her license using the current one plus i.d. like birth certificate and professional license (which required i.d. in the first place). I assisted in securing the documents by going in person to city hall in a state where “A” no longer lives. I had to get someone else to drive me since my health precluded driving at the time. I could not find an online or by-mail way to get the docs. Then I went online to find an address to mail away for documents in a third state, which also could not take online requests & payment. “A” was not able to go online to find that address because she did not have a internet. So it took, “A”, me, my driver, cash, a check, and three postage stamps to get those docs. Good thing I had leisure time to use that way…Never heard whether she really needed all that documentation in GA.

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    • Bear April 29, 2015 / 1:19 pm

      She did need it all.

      Interestingly, I now no longer have a middle name.

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      • wdg3rd April 29, 2015 / 9:21 pm

        What’d you need a middle name for? The only human allowed to use my middle name and keep breathing turned 81 day before yesterday. There is a small select group of people (you’re one of them) I allow to call me by the first syllable of my last name. Just don’t spell Grif with two effs — that was the asshole that sired me.

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        • Bear April 29, 2015 / 11:19 pm

          Short version: By the practices of my family, I chose my middle name. It’s my father’s name; a man I’m fortunate enough to think highly of. No one uses it, but it’s mine, no matter what the bureaucrats try to tell themselves.

          (Hmm… if I’ve ever called you Grif, I must have been interrupted in mid-name. But I’m not sure I’ve ever even called you by the surname. You’ve always been W***.)

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          • wdg3rd April 30, 2015 / 12:00 am

            Yeah, I’m usually Weird oops Ward. You are among the few I will allow to call me Grif. The few I allow to give me grief.

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      • MamaLiberty May 1, 2015 / 5:11 pm

        Unfortunately, I was given a “middle name” on my birth certificate. I’ve tried for at least 50 years to get rid of it. I don’t use it, and don’t want it… but it is part of my “legal name” and crops up every once in a while. One problem being that, since I don’t use it, I forget it… which causes problems occasionally.

        I have to get a DL this year, and only recently learned that Wyoming finally gave in to the “real” bullshit, and I’ll have to figure out how much of my nearly 70 year load of personal paperwork they’ll want me to haul in there. I’ve read the website, but still have no clear idea. I guess I’ll find out. May need to go in there a month early so there’s plenty of time to play the stupid game.

        Mega sigh….

        But aside from the inconvenience, and the fact that the whole license thing is bullshit, I’m not going to tie myself in knots over the paperwork. It’s all a matter of public record, and has been for at least 50 years. They already KNOW that stuff, and have always had access to it. Just more kabuki theater.

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