It. Is. A. [*******]. Telephone.

Apple (AAPL) is reportedly testing a service that would allow Siri to transcribe voicemail messages. Apple’s i-Cloud service would then send users a text message of the voicemail. This new feature is expected to launch in 2016.

And then Siri will read your text messages to you out loud.

(And of course Tesla wants yet another effective subsidy for its electric car.)